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21 November 2010 @ 10:50 am
Not so used to it anymore  
S' boyfriend's (different boyfriend than I've bitched about in the past) mother is the only other lesbian that I know in this town that is my age. She knew that I was gay and that my mom is straight but guess who she hits on. That's right... my mother.


Not that my mom is ugly or anything, in fact mom is gorgeous. But the fact remains that my track is holding out that if there is someone else in the room with me they will be hit on before I will.

I already knew that in this bofunk town my options were even less than when living in a large town or city but damn.

It's also a sad fact of my life that I have only been on about five actual romantic dates. Seven if you count the two that someone made me go on to make a friend happy (the date was with the friend's friend), but I don't like to count those because they just made me feel skeevy.

I know that I'm not the easiest person to know, people have always thought I was weird or too freaky so even having friends have been few and far between. And then I try too hard or just do something to screw things up or I end up having to move and somehow we stop talking as much. I need to keep in mind the lessons I learned as a kid because its better to do without than dealing with the heartbreak. Losing friends are actually worse than losing a romantic interest (well, unless that person you liked was a friend at first).

Um...I have no idea what the point of this is (other than being hormonal or some other bullcrap) so you can ignore it.

Originally posted at http://kazbaby.dreamwidth.org/834801.html. You can comment there using OpenID.|comment count unavailable comments
moodswing: indescribableindescribable
Lee Edward McIlmoyle: How Are You?lee_in_limbo on November 21st, 2010 04:17 pm (UTC)
What I want to say doesn't quite work, but your post puts me in mind of a quote from The Truth About Cats and Dogs:
Dr. Abby Barnes: If I was a guy, I think women would like, line up to go out with me. I'm smart. I have a good sense of humor. I make a great living.
Noelle: I'd fuck you.
Dr. Abby Barnes: Thank you, honey. I know you would.

None of which helps your situation. However, and just for the record, if I were a woman, I'd certainly make a point of hitting on you.

In any event, I do seriously wish that some sweet lady would discover you and sweep you off your feet. I've only known you for a handful of years, but I know very few women that I truly believe deserve the love of (another) good woman in their life. You are one of those few. Brave heart, Kaz. I'm sure she'll find you if you just keep putting yourself out there to be found.

You may, you know, have to consider relocating, though... *sigh* Sadly, it seems that the lesbian element where you live is a bit stunted and sad (present company excepted).

Take care, hon.
Kaz: Savor (Chiana/Taleeka)kazbaby on November 21st, 2010 05:24 pm (UTC)
Lee, you are a real sweetheart and I have to thank you for the smile you've just given me. It is much needed and appreciated. ♥

I wish I could relocate. I'm pretty much stuck here until I can find work and able to save up money to move. If I was still a teenager I'd have plenty of options in meeting girls since the majority of my nieces friends are lesbian or bi and come to me for advice. How's that for messed up? lol
Lee Edward McIlmoylelee_in_limbo on November 22nd, 2010 09:58 am (UTC)
Well, perhaps not so messed up if you like younger women... ;)
ninja007ninja007 on November 22nd, 2010 01:35 am (UTC)

I so know how you feel Chica...