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13 December 2007 @ 07:36 pm
Fic: Heaven Send Hell Away  
Author's Note: This came out of nowhere while I was working on another story and I had to get it out even though it was wanting to be a stubborn little sucker so it took a few days to get the wording to fit what I was picturing. Now I am happy. Many, many thanks should go to ivorygates for beta'ing my grammar on this and making me think more about how I wanted to say certain things in the story. All other mistakes are my own and all feedback is welcome.
Spoilers: PKWars (finale)
Rating: PG (for one Earth curse word)
Disclaimer: Not mine. If it was, we'd have a Farscape channel.

Heaven Send Hell Away

He’s been a son and brother, friend and crewmate. Husband and father. The latter for only a matter of minutes and now he’s doing the unthinkable, the sadly inevitable.

His whole life has been lived as a trial by fire. Some scars will never fade, not that they’ll get much of a chance to now.

He has been – is – cored and hollowed out by anger and pity and worry and love, each one tainted with fear, each one obtained along the hard road that leads to here. To this place, to the ends of the universe.

But fear belonged, no matter how much he despised its presence. Raising its voice to be heard and he wonders if he’s doing the wrong thing; or if destroying thousands of lives, killing a planet, was the only thing left.

Whichever is right, there is one thing that overshadows all of the other emotions boiling from the inside out. Conviction.

The conviction of knowing that if he doesn’t do this there is no way out. Putting himself, his family on the chopping block - that is the only way to be left alone in peace. Anything else - not that there were too many options to choose from - lead to a life enslaved by shadows that are far too real, forever on the run, and he knows that eventually he will be forced to watch as each person he loves dies in this fucked-up conflict that he could have stopped.

He listens as Aeryn tells both sides that they won’t allow their son, his child, to be raised in terror of what lies beyond their walls, and a small part of him, forever set aside only for her, is relieved at her understanding and agreement.

Proud and honored to be standing at her side, they face the mouth of fire and destruction that has chased them since they first met, that he created. No longer running. It’s their fate. To be here, together. Shoulder to shoulder with their futures lying in front of them, in their arms.

There is no thought, only movement, when both sides acquiesce and he wants nothing more than to throw himself in front of the monster he created and keep it from touching those that matter most.

He’s done it before and he’ll do it again and again and again. Whatever it takes.
moodswing: accomplishedaccomplished
Birgit: Leeloo!birgitm on December 14th, 2007 12:57 am (UTC)
Awesomeness! I think I've said this before, but you really have a way of expressing Crichton so well. Especially, as this one attests to, his integrity and conviction.

Thank you for another great one! :)
Kaz: catch me if you cankazbaby on December 14th, 2007 01:34 am (UTC)
HappyCryBlush Thank you so much for such a lovely compliment.
Liza: Stark - Shinelizamanynames on December 14th, 2007 05:44 am (UTC)
I know I've already told you how much I love this, but... I had to comment again and tell you how much I love this. Because I do, I really, really, really do. You have such a fucking gift, two gifts really, for getting into John's heard deeper than anyone, and for expressing these beautiful descriptive golden prose-poems, and when the two come together it's pure fucking magic.
Kaz: Other OTPkazbaby on December 22nd, 2007 06:13 am (UTC)
You're too kind, babe. ♥ Thank you.
Stephanie: J/A beginning of foreverladycallie on December 14th, 2007 02:16 pm (UTC)
and a small part of him, forever set aside only for her, is relieved at her understanding and agreement.

Maybe I'm feeling overly shippy, but that line stuck me. I love them.

Beautiful capture of that moment. There's so much happening on screen, but it's nothing compaired to what's happening in his eyes. You brought the emotion out wonderfully.
Kazkazbaby on December 22nd, 2007 06:14 am (UTC)
That does seem to be a favorite line. I'm really glad you like it. Thank you!