Look Maw...I made sumpin'.
Then there's this...I suggest you put away all liquids, and to lay a few pillows around you for when you land on the floor. Stargate SG-1 Breadbox Edition - Avalon part 1
INT. SGC CONTROL ROOM
[A TECHNICIAN AND CHEVRON GUY WATCH THE GATE ROOM, AS MITCHELL, IN FULL DRESS UNIFORM, IS WALKING UP THE RAMP TO THE INACTIVE STARGATE.]
TECHNICIAN: Who's that?
CHEVRON GUY: Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell. Two years ago. Dogfight over Antarctica. SG-1 found the Ancient Outpost. Took out Anubis's fleet.
TECHNICIAN: (awed tone) That's him?
CHEVRON GUY: That's him.
FARSCAPE FANS: That's *him* baybee!
INT. SGC GATE ROOM
[MITCHELL IS STUDYING THE STARGATE WITH INTEREST. HE REACHES DOWN TO TOUCH THE RING.]
AUDIENCE: He's totally feeling the gate up, isn't he?
SGC STARGATE: [humming "You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman"] 'Bout damn time someone shows me the love and respect I deserve.
ATLANTIS GATE: But... but... I got the Vegas slot machine upgrade!
SGC STARGATE: Age and experience trumps flashy trash every time, you ho.
ATLANTIS GATE: Bitch.
SGC STARGATE: Skank.
PUDDLE JUMPER: You know I love you both equally, right? [...] So how about a little three-way action?
Ya...and it keeps getting better from there!
Oh, and this is courtesy of birthsister all of those feeling that they need therapy, just join me and psychicnagger in the group session on Tuesday nights.