November 1st, 2009

Cowboys Get The Blues (John)

pay me no nevermind

there are some days that i wish i never made that promise to hd on his birthday. no, i'm not going say what the promise was if you don't already know.

i've had a few bad days but thankfully they've been sporadic and seem to lift after a few hours sleep. unconsciousness is a good thing. it means darkness and not having to think or feel shit that wants to plow me under.

i'm an idiot for feeling like this, right? i mean i'm in a better place than i was with a fresh start, i have my dog, a great friend (more than one actually), a temp job that's going to last the rest of the week at the very least. plus, i have metallica to look forward to next week after wishing to see them for 20 damn years almost.

so why do i feel like i want to crawl in a fucking ball, cry until i pass out and pray for nothingness.

blah, blah, blah...fuck it. it'll pass, it always does. i just have to suck it up and deal.